The US Mint announced today that they are releasing a new hundred dollar bill. The bill still features Benjamin Franklin; however hidden within his pupil is a cat’s asshole. The goal of the new bill is to thwart counterfeiters while also catering to the Cat Fanciers Society who has...
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The new television show “No Clownin’ Around” produced by the Children’s Television Workshop and broadcast on PBS is receiving positive reviews. The show features a six eyed clown who loses an eye for each mistake that he makes in firearms protocol. In one scene Hexeye, the aforementioned clown, loses...
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In what he describes as “Getting back to my roots”, Vin Diesel has begun work on the sequel to the Too Fast Too Furious franchise which originally brought his name into the spotlight. In his new film, Diesel is an oiled up grease monkey who meets a transsexual race...
readmore Old NewsBy Jennifer Brandon June 13th, 1999. I’ll never forget that day. It was the was one of worst nights of my life and one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. I’ve never told anybody about this, but that was the evening I made out with a wussy. It’s hard to comprehend why ...
readmore EditorialsPhysicians across the country are warning people about the fertility risks of delaying childbirth. “As we women age it becomes progressively more difficult for us to bear children, both physiologically and emotionally,” says Dr. Sandra Oak, 32 year old resident in Gynecology. “We are seeing more women these days who are coming into fertility clinics ...
readmore EditorialsPeople these days are just too cautious. The other day I went to my doctor and told him I had been playing Russian Roulette with my friends after a game of dice in the alley. The look on his face. He told me that it was dangerous, that I was going to end up dead ...
readmore EditorialsYou have made the claim that your mistress is more attractive than my wife for the ninth time this month. As far as I am concerned, that is nine times too many! I see several options in resolving this dispute. The first would be a traditional duel involving either fisticuffs or firearms. The downside of ...
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